xin is useless

I purposely created a password fer my blog fer ppl whu are really close to read my entries. hmms. Am feeling sad nw. 'Cause of what happen to my gd fren. argh. Hmms. Dun wry abt it, girl. Its oni natural that I feel this way. =)

Sumhow, looking at things now, brings back alot of stuffs. All that I haf been thru. The heartaches, the non-stop crying. As well as the tots that went thru my mind during that dark period. Girl, you aren't alone. It's only natural to think of such tots. To feel lost, confused n even the tots of dying. But think abt it. Are those tots worthed put into action? Think abt the consequences. Think abt how ur frens n family wld feel. You've gotta be strong fer them. Just rmb that you'll always have ppl, frens, family members whu really care. If there's anething, just find sumone to tok to. Don't ever worry about troubling ppl. Its not good to keep things bottled up. I used to do it. And I regretted it. 'Cause I nearly died of depression. Rmb that there'll always be us standing by you. Thats what makes u so different frm me. Don't ever think of doing anything stupid. Its not going to make things better. It might just worsen things. My dear girl, rmb that we love you =) God makes things happen fer a reason. Haf faith, dear=)

Hmms. If I were to say, I ain't affected by this all. I wld be lying. Haha. *shrugs* I feel sumthing special between me n my dear girl. Sth reali special. Sth that oni besties share. A ever so special bond. hmms. Of course, I wld feel insecurity right now. But I know, thats not going to help things. I shld haf faith n trust, even if I don't haf in myself, I shld be trusting my other half. Hmms. Sumhow, I feel that, if the same things were to happen to me all over again, I wldn't know what to do. All I know is that, I wld be very lost. And so, I pray hard that, I wun hafta go thru all those again. I hope. =X

I feel so soso guilty. Fer not being able to help though I haf the same experience. Or rather, worse. Just follow ur heart, my dear. Dun lose ur faith due to circumstances. You're a rational girl, frm what I haf always known you to be. Promise me, that you'll gona be all well n happy soon kays? =) I'll pray fer you=)

`I can never imagine life w/o you. I'm feeling scared n insecured right now.